Why do We Lie to Ourselves?

Relationships end, people go their separate ways, some people even get with someone new. But what is it that keeps the majority of us from staying single? We know we want to be with that certain someone, no matter how many negative emotions or walls we have up against them. They may have done us wrong a million times in the past, went with someone else, even cheated on us; yet we just can't seem to let that person walk out of our lives for whatever reason. Why is that? It's like we can't just throw in the towel and say "I'm done, this just isn't worth it anymore." That's because no matter what your gut feeling is telling you, your heart is saying that your work isn't done. There's gotta be something in the relationship that's worth holding on to, otherwise you would've walked away a long time ago. There are some things that'll stop a relationship from growing the way it should, however.


Guys love to act like they don't care about their exes anymore, especially when the relationship didn't end on good terms. Sadly, girls are the same way, except worse. Guys might act like they don't care, but girls will take it to the next level. They'll get a new boy toy just to piss off their exes, and they'll do or say things about that person in front of you that'll have you crying like a newborn baby behind closed doors. I love it when guys try to act like they have no soul, when in reality they're hurting more than the girl is. Don't get me wrong, the girl is hurting too, but really it depends on who did what. That may not even matter in the end, though. Most of the time the two people are just dying to know when the other person is going to respond to their desperate pleas for attention. No need to take things overboard, though. Some guys can't help but always have to know what their ex is doing, especially if their in love with them.


Girls Don't Like Creepers. If you're the type of guy who'll hide out in your ex's bush just to find out what the heck she's doing, that can be good or bad; a lot more bad than good though, most of the time. Sure, you'll be able to have that peace of mind knowing her ass is at home watching The Notebook for the fifth time; hell, you might even even be able to keep an eye out and make sure she's not being sneaky. Be careful, though. If the girl becomes aware of you lurking around her yard like some kind of thief, you might as well pack your bags and catch the next Tri-Rail because she's going to be turned OFF by always knowing in the back of her head that you're probably in the hedges five feet away. If you get too carried away with it, the girl might lose the feelings she had for you if the relationship isn't that strong. You don't need to be blowing up her phone every five minutes just because you're insecure. Give it a rest. If you two have been together since the Stone Age, she might be used to your annoying habits, since she's grown on you. But I can tell you for a fact that this ain't healthy in the beginning stages. Can't blame him though if he has a reason for having to do this!


Guys Don't Like Friendly Girls. Period. I'm feeling like I need to touch on this issue because it's one of the most pressing, if not annoying issues in a relationship, male or female. I don't care if I'm black man from Florida or a brown man from Malaysia. I can tell you one unknown universal characteristic about all men: they don't like friendly girls. Okay, so your relationship has been having some problems lately. The girl's been hanging out with all kinds of guys from A to Z and you don't know how to tell her because you're afraid of upsetting your significant other and you're tired of fighting. Well, there's only one thing I can tell you to do. Tell her, straight up. Don't bother wasting your time beating around the bush like this is Ring Around the Rosie. She needs to know that that isn't acceptable to you. The better looking she is, the more annoying it's going to be to see the loads of guys ogling over your girl's voluptuous body. Hey, if you're the type of guy that doesn't care who your girlfriend hangs out with, more power to you. Personally, I think if you're going to have a certain level of solemnity in a relationship, it's not appropriate for either person to be hanging out or callin' up a bunch of people of the opposite sex. If you say the relationship isn't serious, then do what you want. Either way, I know a guy isn't gonna like knowing that you're the type of girl to wish him goodnight after a phone call just to pick it up again and call your "best friend" Mike while he sleeps. Don't tell yourself that certain behaviors that you don't like are "okay" or that you'll just "live with them." If they're correctable, and you both know they're wrong, then fix it. Sorry, but the whole "take me as I am" argument doesn't apply here. Same goes for guys, too.

Guys May Not Like Friendly Girls, but Girls HATE Friendly Guys. Okay, so you met Prince Charming, tall, dark and handsome. He's so sexy, he's one of the popular kids at school, and he's as real as could be. He just has one problem, he's... a little... friendly. Fix it, or leave. Now. Trust me. You don't want that kind of nonsense in your relationship, especially if your boyfriend fits the description above. Guys have things called egos, and the sexier they think they are, the more gassed up they'll get when an attractive chick thinks he's fine too. On top of that, their egos will take complete control of them, unless your boyfriend is aware of the the attention he can attract and chooses to ignore it. You can know you look good, that's fine. Just don't do anything stupid with it. I personally think I'm a pretty good looking dude. Does that give me the excuse to whip out the ol' iPhone and start typing a love letter to the first cute girl in my contact list? No. I have a girlfriend, and I'm completely devoted to her. Some guys think this is okay, though. They think that as soon as their girl starts to trip, it's time to put on that Trey Songz charm and get to work. Especially if the girl is friendly, too. No. Be mature, guys. You're more likely to have a successful relationship if you just cut the whole high school act and be an adult. If your girlfriend thinks you're friendly, trust me when I say she'll be sneaking around behind your back like she's learning from Swiper. Don't lie to yourself, you love your significant other, and you want to be with them. If you really want to see new people, then alright, that's what you want to do. But I know this isn't the case for most of you. Just cut the crap and do what you have to do.